Changing your job and the inner critic - what you need to know
“You are really silly to think that this idea would work out!” or “What if you fail? How will you pay your bills then?!” sounds familiar? These are two typical examples of the inner critic. This nasty voice in your head gets particularly annoying when you are about to make a change in your life or career. So let´s have a closer look at your inner critic and what you can do if she gets too feisty.Throughout this article, you´ll notice that I often refer to “her” when talking about the inner critic. This way, I want to make her more tangible and less abstract.
What is the inner critic?
The inner critic is this annoying voice in your head that complains, tells you what is not working well (and never will), reminds you of your failures, and points at what you are not good at. The inner critic is an ancient survival mechanism of your brain that tries to keep you safe. By constantly reminding you of all the possible dangers and your potential shortcomings, the inner critic wants to prevent you from taking action, changing the status quo, and going against the grain. Because evolutionary, leaving the predetermined path, doing things your way, and potentially going against what your community would do was dangerous.Luckily enough, nowadays this is not really a threat anymore. You can go for your dreams, change careers, move cities, leave old connections behind and meet new people. Nevertheless, your inner critic is still by your side, reminding you of all the dangers out there. Particularly when you are about to make a big career change or decide to live life differently.Characteristics of the inner critic
Have you ever paid attention to your inner critic? Then you´ll probably notice that she sounds harsh, unfriendly, and very repetitive. Your inner critic is closely connected to perfectionism and black-and-white thinking and will rarely argue rationally. She shows up when you least need her and usually bombards your ideas. She´s the one casting doubt - without offering any solutions or perspective. And, we all have an inner critic. Some hear her more loudly, others more subtle, but even the most successful, happy, balanced people have to deal with this voice in their head at times. So you are not alone.Why do you need to pay attention to your inner critic when you are unhappy at work?
If you are unhappy in your job it´s very normal that your inner critic shows up. Work plays a very important role in our lives. Your job is what pays the bills. Your job is tied to your identity, your image, and often social network too. So of course, if you are thinking of changing that, your inner critic will make an appearance. Pay attention to this voice in your head as she can make it harder to think of good alternatives to your work situation and take intentional action to change what is.Three ways how the inner critic can sabotage you when unhappy at work
AMPLIFIES THE LACK OF CLARITYA crucial step in finding a fulfilling career is to come up with ideas of what you could do. Ideas about alternative career paths, things that could excite you, and ideas of how you could get there. Something the inner critic does not like at all. So your inner critic will do everything to bombard your ideas, cast doubt into your dreams, and make sure you´ll not let your imagination run too wild. The result: feeling stuck in the status quo. If you can´t think of alternatives, how can you take action?! If you can´t imagine a different career path, how can you create it?! So you stay in your job, feel stuck, and start to doubt if things will ever change. Job well done, inner critic!RAISES DOUBTSMaking changes to your life or job requires courage. You´ll potentially have to leave your old job, company, or career behind, try something new, jump into unknown waters. This requires a leap of faith. Unfortunately, your inner critic will do everything to make sure you stay where you are. She will remind you of all the things that could go wrong when leaving your job. She`ll spotlight all the stories you ever heard about people “failing” to change their lives. And she´ll make sure that you start to doubt your abilities, resources, and capabilities. With all those doubts in the back of your head, it will be hard to be courageous and take brave steps.CLOUDS YOUR DECISION-MAKING ABILITIESBecause your inner critic is fueled by fear, she´s not a good advisor when making decisions. Good decisions are based on rational reasons, intuition, or the knowledge that this is what needs to be done. Your inner critic wants you to make decisions based on what has the least impact on how things are right now. So instead of thinking about good solutions to your situation, you'll fear changing things and worry about what could go wrong. In other words: your inner critic keeps you feeling stuck and lost.A new relationship with the inner critic is necessary
The inner critic is annoying and can be quite harmful. She can bombard your dreams, keep you stuck, and hold you back from going for your dreams. There are many techniques of how you can work better with her, and reduce the damaging effect she can have. Some of them I share in my podcast, for example in this episode, or that one.But the most important step is probably to understand that your inner critic is a natural protection system. Nothing evil, nothing entirely bad, but simply a mode of your brain that tries to keep you safe. If you think of her like that, you´ll notice that she inherently has only good intentions and tries to protect you from harm. Seeing her like that, a protective mechanism, instead of destructive and negative, will help you already to shift your relationship with your inner voice. Instead of working against her, you can start to work with her, e.g. by asking: what is it that you need so you feel safe?Three things you can do so your inner critic is not in the way of changing your career and life
This is what you can do to make sure that your inner critic won´t hold you back from taking action toward your goals.Realistic thinking
A simple way of challenging your inner critic is to ask yourself: “Is this true?”. This simple reality check will help you in two ways:You´ll notice when your inner critic is speaking to you. This way, you´ll start to pay attention to this inner dialog and not take everything you hear as a given reality.It will help you to distinguish between very vague, highly theoretical threats and reasonable risks you want to consider before taking action. Not everything your inner critic says is an exaggeration, sometimes it´s useful input that will help you make better decisions.
Try stuff!
Your inner critic does not like change. So what about “just trying things out” instead of going all-in? In Designing Your Life we call this approach prototyping and it is a great way of taking small steps towards your goals without committing to a certain result. So instead of quitting your job right now to start your own business, what about making a business plan first, talking to others who have done this before to gain information, and starting your own business as a side-hustle to test how that feels and goes. Prototyping is all about taking small, manageable actions to build your way forward as you go.Your mindset
Although it might feel uncomfortable and inconvenient, it's okay to have an inner critic. You are not weird, you are not specifically anxious, and you certainly don't have “mindset issues” because you hear this nasty voice when thinking of changing your job. It´s your natural protector that wants to prevent harm. So the next time your inner critic speaks up, remind yourself that this is your inner critic speaking. It´s a protection mechanism - and says nothing about what you are capable of, what you can achieve, and what is possible for you! ————
Hey, I am Laura a certified Designing Your Life Coach, recruitment professional, podcaster, multi-passionate career changer, and business owner, In my Designing Your (Work) Life 1:1 Coaching series, I will help you to gain clarity about what you want in life and your career, equip you with the tools you need to create a fulfilling (work) life and move through challenges along the way. Because this is not only about a job but about what life you want to live! 🌿
